Well, kiddies, if misery loves company, then I should be truly contented this week. First, I was joined by Kevin "She hate me" Federline in the "first male wives" club. Now comes the news, via the AP, that Kid Rock, too, has been kicked to the curb.
Yes, it's true, dear readers. Pamela Anderson, the one-time heroine of Tool Time and fantasy girl of Borat Sadiyev, has had enough bawitdaba in her life and called it quits after four months of matrimony, give or take.
For anyone who's counting, that's a month longer than my most recent celebration of love. Though, to be fair, I was screwing that one up after a month.
(To my formerly betrothed: That's my jacked-up way of saying I'm sorry. Not that it wins you back or anything.)
But I digress. We were talking about a wannabe cowboy and his comely Playmate ex-wife. I have no advice for Kid. He'll land on his feet, if for no other reason than that his cranium is so much lighter and smaller by comparison.
But sweet, dear Pam: You will need a good rebound. Someone who, like you, is going through a stressful time, but who isn't so sensitive that he will get attached.
My suggestion: Michael Richards.
Oh yeah, and have some pop candy.
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